Jealousy is a strong feeling that when we feel it we become insecure, irritated and live with the fear that we will lose something we love very much. If we continue to feel jealous for a long time, then chances are we will acquire an unhealthy habit that will deprive us of the joy of our interpersonal relationships. If we find that we are jealous of something or someone too much, to the point of feeling uncomfortable and unable to think clearly, then it is time for action!
1. Notice what makes you jealous. How do you interpret it? What are you really afraid of? For example, when a friend of yours befriends someone else, are you jealous? Why; Why are you afraid that you may be left alone? Or why do you feel inadequate and blame yourself for not being interesting enough to keep your friend? And then ask yourself… are these thoughts healthy? Is it possible to have only two people in the world, you and your boyfriend and live isolated from everyone else?
2. When you are ready to make a scene of jealousy, do not give in to the impulse of the moment. Think clamly first and ask yourself if you should make a scene or not. Count the pros and cons. Is it worth ruining a relationship for an impulse of the moment that may not even exist? Is it worth losing a person you love because you cannot restrain your negative thoughts? You decide and then act accordingly!
3. Jealousy builds walls that you may not be able to tear down in the future! When we open our mouths and utter insults and accusations at others and offend them … it is not certain that they will ever forgive us, especially when we keep repeating this behavior. So, we gradually become alienated from others who begin to see us with a different eye and avoid us because they cannot stand our quarrels. Do you think it is easy to change the impression they have formed for us? It takes a lot of effort without the result being certain, because they too have already formed an opinion about your behavior… and it is not the best!
4. Cultivate your confidence. Excessive expression of jealousy is due to low self-esteem and high insecurity. Do not behave driven by others. Find the strengths of your character and your skills and focus on strengthening them. Also try to make new acquaintances to get rid of your negative thoughts that may be about abandonment! If you build a good network of friends, you will feel better and stronger. It is worth the effort.
5. Trust. There is a high probability that you will feel jealous of someone, because in the past someone took advantage of your trust and betrayed you, as a result of which you believe that it will happen again and you will be afraid. But is it certain that it will happen again? Aren’t you able to recognize the signs, now that you know them? Can’t you set boundaries to prevent this unpleasant – admittedly – experience from happening again?
What is certain is that it is not possible to live in a castle isolated forever, because someone once betrayed you. Life is full of interesting upheavals, if you live it!
It is no coincidence that jealousy has been characterized as a green monster that drains the life of the one who feels it. Keep a positive attitude about things and look at the positive side of things, not the negative. And if you cannot manage jealousy yourself, turn to a specialist for help! Remember… do not make rush decisions and do not react impulsively to your negative thoughts. You get upset and also the other person is scared by your reactions! In other words, you are lost anyway!
