“Marriage is a lottery,” as the elders use to say, “if it succeeds, it is as if you have won the first number.” And that’s kind of how things are. The success of a marriage is based on many components … Is there whining, stinginess, understanding, good sex, weirdness, devaluation, admiration? Sure, we all start with the best conditions when we get married, but when time passes and the prince transforms into a frog what do we do then? We give up or try to revitalize our marriage. And if we choose revival, how is it done?
1. Speak up.
Do not wait for your partner to figure out for himself what is happening or what is bothering you. You need to tell him. I know it seems difficult, but it is better to communicate than regret later that you did not. After all, everyone has the right to be tired and frustrated. So, it is say what you do not like, so that the situation improves and you do not carry the weight inside you waiting for a miracle to “save” you.
2. Create rituals of tenderness.
A kiss for good morning and good night is important to make your spouse feel your love. You give 30 seconds of your time but you earn a lot more. If you have children who absorb your attention and care, find time to share some tender moments with your partners. Do not forget that your children are the fruits of a great love, the one you had with your spouse before you got married.
3. See a Consultant
If there are major problems in your relationship or some outstanding issues from the past that affect your marriage and you cannot manage them yourself, seek the help of a specialist. Do not hesitate. Give your wedding a chance and do everything you can before saying goodbye. Both you and your relationship deserve it.
4. Make secret appointments.
Once a week or every fortnight, make an appointment with your spouse in a place that will be your paradise and where you can escape together. Do not allow anyone to invade there and disturb your peace. Keep this place as most precious and renew your relationship as often as you can. Talk, make love, have a romantic dinner, communicate without distractions. And do not allow anyone or anything to make you cancel this appointment !.
5. Remind others of your feelings.
Leave papers in the drawer or nightstand that say how much you love your partner and how important they are to you. Do not take it for granted that they know it, because we all like to be told words of love, no matter how many years pass.
We can all feel frustrated in a marriage. And maybe we’re thinking of breaking up. Sometimes it is better not to get caught up in the little things, such as unwashed clothes thrown on the floor or toothpaste in the sink, but to focus on the important and essential. Communication is a skill. It is cultivated after effort and perseverance. So do not be afraid. Communicate both the good and the bad to your spouses. After all, didn’t you once fall in love with this person? This person cannot have changed into someone else. So, what do you say? Will you give it another chance?
